We're all going to be in our 40s by the end of the year

im 23. what the hell is gonna happen to me

You're gonna die a lot

in a funny spot where i would like to be perceived as a woman but not in a "oh thats a cis woman" way. like i don't want to hide that im trans at all. if you see me looking cunted up like crazy and then a deep ass Had a Beard In High School voice comes out of my mouth you are fuckin welcome. you should be so thankful to be graced by the presence of the hottest bitch on the planet

when you see a big girl with broad shoulders and unshaved legs and shittily applied makeup like she just started doing it for the first time three months ago and a voice like the faggiest bitch on the planet you should be doing this

beetle juice????? yikes !! ummm i think I’ll stick with APPLE juice if that’s okay with everyone !!!

Color theory: there are several colors

iron chef judge: this carrot slice is really cute. you cut it like a flower?

me: yes 🥰🌼

iron chef judge 2: i love your use of powder sugar on the pudding . makes it look like a mountain top

me: the himalayes 😊

sometimes i dip my siffrin in tar and they scream loud as fuuuuuuck

i think “You get [enormous sum of money] for [exceedingly trivial requirement] Can you do it???” “I don’t knowwww” is endlessly funny as a joke format. u can do that shit forever

cardamom, cinnamon, saffron, nutmeg, clove, star anise, black pepper, allspice, cumin, fennel, turmeric, coriander, bay leaf, sumac, juniper, fenugreek, ginger, mace, mustard seed, thyme, rosemary, marjoram, lavender, oregano, basil, tarragon, sage, chervil, dill, parsley, mint

Scarborough Fair extended edition